"The Talk"

This is why it's so important that a blog like working hearts exists.

When the sidekick arrived home from work today, I cuddled up next to him and we chatted about our evening plans (something that domesticated, cuddly sidekicks tend to do). I informed him that I had a "date" with Peter, and that I wasn't sure how long I'd be out.

And then this...out of the blue, but not entirely unexpected:

"Please don't have sex with him."

I knew that this would happen eventually. I know that it's been eating away at him since day one, but I needed to hear it from him first. It isn't my job to play games with my partner, poking around until I discover what he is and isn't comfortable with; it's his job to tell me this - as honestly and articulately as he can. And now it's my job to do some emotional juggling. I have a responsibility to protect my best interests, his best interests, and the overall best interest of "us" as a unit.

"I'm sorry," I said.

I couldn't look him in the eye. I felt like I'd lied, although I knew the ambiguity of what I'd been doing was not lost on him.

"No, I'm sorry," he said. "I just can't stand you doing this."

For those of you who have asked what it's like trying to find a balance, here is your answer.