Entertaining his fantasy (the trials and tribulations of Polyamory Pt 1)

I'd seen him watching me; when we crossed paths in the library, from across the room at a party, sideways glances at the bar. I couldn't escape it. We always seemed to end up in the same place at the same time. It was uncanny.

At a party a few months back, I was dancing with my very best girlfriend and caught his eye.

"I think that kid wants to fuck me," I said.
"How do you know?" She gave him a quick once-over and shrugged.
"I don't know. The way he looks at me, I guess."

She suggested that maybe he looked at everyone that way, and I wondered how someone as bubbly and attractive as Trina had yet to identify "The Look." It was different than the "You Look Interesting Look" and the "I have a Little Crush on You Look." This was a pointed, searing laser of sex and power.

I turned my back and kept dancing. If he wanted it that badly, he'd have to come to me.

When he reappeared this summer, I began to reconsider my position. I'm confident in my external presentation, but I'm no Grade A head turner. I can walk into a bar feeling relatively at ease. I don't get free drinks, no one slides strategically onto the barstool next to me, and I rarely have to deal with bad pickup lines. All things considered, I guess I was...how do you say...flattered? I'd never experienced this type of unrelenting attraction. It was a turn-on, so I offered the occasional flirtatious smile in return.

We crossed paths again last week. I realized that we'd never spoken in person before, and I was happy to initiate conversation. After a bit of idle chit-chat, I asked if he'd like to grab a drink sometime. We parted ways, and I left with that fresh, spearminty taste of power in my mouth (a feeling that I occasionally pretend to control).

As I walked through town, I began to wonder if our roles were now reversed. By remaining at a distance, he had fueled my desire to be desired. The excitement of entertaining his fantasy had left me dizzy and reckless. I wasn't sure whose fantasy this was anymore, but I felt safeguarded by the knowledge of mutual vulnerability.